Edit on Mar 9, 2021: This is the actual first post of this website. All previous posts were taken from my personal notes on paper, and labelled with their original date.

There are two extremes that must be avoided.

There is the extreme of narcissism. Sometimes I have these urges to write for sharing publicly my thoughts. There’s obviously a delusion of grandeur: I write to be read, to be praised, acclaimed. And this leads to pretentious writing, self-aggrandizing writing, sophistic elaborations, and ultimately just plain bad content.

There is the extreme of the impostor syndrome. Nothing seems good enough, interesting enough. I will just end up being shamed by any serious expert or scholar. Why should I need to share anyway? My ideas are only making myself progress along the path, no one else needs to know. And this leads to keeping my thoughts for myself, not writing anything at all.

But I can’t just do nothing. I don’t believe that Buddhism should be limited to individual progress. It is a social practice as much as a personal one. And I might have some relevant thoughts. I have been a scholar myself on other topics, I know how to decompose and recompose, generate and synthetize. That could be helpful. And if it’s not, well nobody will know who I am anyway, I can just shut the whole thing down, roll under a desk and cry.

Writing about what? Buddhism, or something. I met Buddhism in the early 2000s, started practicing in the early 2010s. I read a lot of books. I took notes, left post-its in the margins, highlighted the quotes I wanted to cling to, wrote commentaries of my own, speculated for hours. That must be worth something, right?

We’ll see.